Moms, Do Yourselves a Favor and Get Fitted for a Good Bra

By

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October 16, 2018

Maybe this is weird, but hear me out.

Ladies, answer me this question. When was the last time you bought yourself a new bra? If you did so recently, maybe this post isn’t for you. BUT, if you haven’t purchased a new lady support system since God knows when, bear with me. I firmly believe bras are the worst, and there are very few feelings in the world better than the relief of taking a bra off after a long day. Alas, bras are a necessary evil for most of us, so we wear them every day.

But how many of you have ever actually paid attention to how your bra fits? Let me clarify what I mean by “fits” because I’m sure many of you are thinking, “Of course it fits. I can close the band, and the cups cover the girls just fine.” Those things mean your bra is functional, but it doesn’t mean it fits.

Up until about a six weeks ago, I had spent my bra-wearing years blindly guessing what size I was. I wore the same bras, from the same store, in two different band and/or cup size combinations. I would hold off on buying bras until the last possible minute when my current ones were barely holding on (literally and figuratively) and then buy whatever was available at the few stores that sold my size (perks of being plus size). Then recently, I ventured into Victoria’s Secret for the first time ever. I had lost enough weight after my surgery to finally fit into their bras AND my very old bras were now completely wrong in size and in rough shape anyway.

I was SO nervous.

I’m not a super confident woman, and the thought of a stranger measuring me for something pretty personal was nerve-wracking. But I put it into perspective — this was the girl’s job and something she did on a near-daily basis. The measuring process was over in about two minutes. Within another three minutes, I had a few different options to try on. I felt the difference IMMEDIATELY when I put the first bra on. This was different than any other bra I had ever worn. The band was SO comfortable and stayed where it was supposed to. The cups didn’t have weird gaps anywhere. It was pretty awesome.

Yes, I did just describe a bra fitting as awesome. It is weird being a grown-up. I hated the thought of spending the money, but my husband convinced me it was worth having bras that fit and were well made. I ordered two the next morning (on clearance, because baby steps) and got them about four days later.

OK, so maybe you truly don’t have time to hit a store that can measure you. I get it. But there are ways to do it at home. I suggest the website HerRoom. There’s an entire page dedicated to not only how to measure, but different tests you can do at home to see if a bra truly is the right size. Also, please know I’m not advocating AT ALL for buying bras at a certain store. If there’s a Target or Walmart bra you LOVE and it passes all the tests? Have at it, girlfriend, and load up on those bad boys. I’m not saying you need to spend a lot of money on each one, I’m just urging you to take the time to make sure what you do buy is the best for you.

Also, maybe I’m just wicked late to the party, but to ensure your girls are consistently cared for, please try to take the time to wash your bras with care. I used to throw caution to the wind and wash my bras with all my other clothes. Hooks bent or broke off completely, straps twisted into tangled knots. Now, I’m washing my bras separately in laundry bags, and they have stayed in better shape than any other bra I’ve had.

OK. I’m done. Maybe this was weird and TMI, but we moms ignore so many of our own needs sometimes. But to me, this seems like a small thing we can do for ourselves to help us feel our best. Maybe your bra won’t be so uncomfortable. Maybe you’ll like the way you look. The benefits will be personal and individual — give it a try!

Staying Married for the Kids :: Yes or No?

By

Linette Bullock

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October 11, 2018

I took one final look around. Piles of bags were neatly arranged in what would soon become my former living room. Loud thumps alerted the neighbors as my father tossed bags on the bed of his truck. I peeked through the blinds, as my husband used to do whenever he heard noises on our street. My aunt was organizing my daughter’s toys in her trunk. It was all coming together. Our eight-year marriage had finally come to an end.

The breakup lasted seven years. That’s how long we knew we weren’t happy. I realized I wanted to end the marriage three years before I actually left, but I didn’t want my daughter to experience all the emotions that would come with the transition of divorce. Her biological father, who I was separately co-parenting with, found an amazing woman and fell in love. Their relationship led to engagement, marriage, and the younger sibling my daughter had long been asking for. She was now going through transitions of her own. How could I put her through one more? I wanted to provide familiarity, a sanctuary. A place that truly felt like home.

Day in and day out, my husband and I strung along a repetitive routine that both of us could recite with our eyes closed. It reached a point where we no longer fought; we coexisted in the simplest way. We were perfect roommates, lacking any form of romantic connection. Those days came and went faster than my heart and mind could register. We found rays of happiness in our friendship, bound by our love for movies, food, and family. He was a good man, and I had to learn that although he was a nice person, it didn’t mean he was the right person for me.

For three years, I pursued my passions and rebuilt confidence, though it wasn’t easy to break the routine and get my mojo back. We blamed each other for the failures in our marriage and, frankly, were both responsible. There was a darker period of nasty fights. My daughter never witnessed them, but the tensions manifested in other ways. I wondered whether she noticed we were unhappy. He had been her stepfather for all these years, and they had become inseparable. The years passed, and I weighed the pros and cons. My family and friends knew I was unhappy but respected my decision to stay every time. Truth is, I could have stayed married to him forever, but we both would have been unhappy, and my daughter would have never seen me the way I am now.

I always believed in love. Through it all, I knew there was someone out there for me. I refused to accept that this was it, even though I sometimes had my doubts. I knew that leaving meant there was a chance it would be trial and error until I would find him. When I reconnected with someone I cared deeply for, I didn’t want to go about things in a way that would hurt anyone. I was confident this was the right time.

My daughter and I moved from a spacious three-bedroom apartment to a smaller shared living space with my grandmother. The transition was difficult. My grandmother suffers from Alzheimer’s, and it brings forth good and bad days. The ups and downs were all part of the decision. I chose to pursue love, and owning up to how I wanted to see my life led to packing up. My daughter knew everything. Transparency helped us transition. I told her she could ask me anything at any time. We had daily discussions about our feelings and where we stood. She was happier than before.

A couple of months later, she met the person I was dating and noticed the difference. He and I were more affectionate. It was more than friendship. She noticed each change and became my number one supporter. She said I smiled more. We did more things together — things like long drives alone, which strengthened that bond. For years, I was afraid of the effects a separation or divorce would have on her. But in reality, things got better.

The decision to stay or leave isn’t easy. There are many factors to consider — ones that only you know. Sometimes staying is best. Some couples are able to work through their differences. My advice — woman to woman, mom to mom — is to find space in your decision to consider you. My rule of thumb was, “What advice would I give my daughter? Am I living true to that advice?” It boiled down to no — I’d never want her to stay in any relationship that truly made her unhappy. Either way, the road will be tough. Hardship is inevitable, but even in the midst of the most tumultuous times, you have a choice. You can always change your stars.

These Hands

By

Kate Cotter

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October 9, 2018

Lately, I’ve been noticing my hands quite a bit — and how much they’ve changed in the five years since I first became a mother. I knew my body would change after growing three tiny humans, but my hands? The way they have changed both literally and figuratively has been one of the biggest surprises to me in motherhood so far.

I have a distinct memory from college, when one of my good friends asked me to hold out my hands; she put hers next to mine and said, “Look, our hands still look so young!” Little did I know they would change so dramatically when I became a mother.

These days my hands sport chipped, brittle nails that rarely see a manicure. My fingers are swollen and chapped and often have a weird allergic rash on them. These hands that once leisurely, gingerly turned the pages of a book on a Sunday morning, that typed thoughtful documents for clients, that handwrote lovely thank you notes on a regular basis — now they never stop moving. They are changing diapers. They are submerged in water and soap. They are buttering toast. They are wiping bottoms, crafting meals and snacks, catching bodily fluids, coloring, playing with Legos, lugging around a car seat and groceries, holding tissues to noses, and clutching chubby fingers as we cross the street.

Now, these hands are so so full, each and every day. And I’m told so constantly when I’m out with my brood of boys, at preschool pickup, navigating the stroller through the library doors, at T-ball games, pushing swings at the playground, wielding a shopping cart down the aisles (baby covered in groceries): “Wow, three boys — your hands are so full!”

I was at a Barnes & Noble recently, perusing new titles for 30 seconds following a kids’ storytime event, and an elderly gentleman stopped in his tracks, looked at my boys (who were chasing each other around a table), and declared, “How do you ever have time to read? Your hands are so full!”

Yes, my hands are so full right now. And at the end of every day, I truly feel like I just took my turn at “pin the tail on the donkey,” but spun around a few too many times, taking a stab at hitting a target while dizzy and unable to see clearly.

But my hands are no fuller than any other mom’s; the truth is, every mother’s hands are very full. Their hands, constantly doing things for their children, are the outward symbol of their hearts full of love.

My oldest son just started kindergarten, and I am all too aware that this is the beginning of my hands becoming a little less full during the day. Oh, they will still be plenty full for years to come. But with this new milestone, the winds of our daily lives have shifted once again, and my hands will be steering the helm of the ship as we navigate new waters.

My changing hands are a metaphor for this journey of motherhood, and while they look so different from what they were before, I think they are most beautiful when they are so full.

Apple Orchards Less Traveled :: 12 Boston-Area Hidden Gems for Pick-Your-Own Fruit

By

Jacquelyn Eckmann

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October 4, 2018

apple orchards - Boston Moms Blog

It’s officially fall in New England, and if you haven’t been hit with fall fever yet, you certainly will soon. With that fever comes the pumpkin spice cravings, the daydreams of leaf peeping, and, of course, the day trips to those adorable rural small-town orchards for apple picking.

As a resident of “apple picking country,” as the locals call it, I’m going to guess that you and your family have probably, at some point in your lives, made the pilgrimage to pluck your bushel of apples off the trees at a place that seems more like an apple theme park than an orchard. And if I’m correct, I can guess that after spending the day at one of these oh-so-well-known Boston-area apple orchards, you left feeling a little worse for the wear than when you arrived with stars in your eyes earlier that day.

After all, spending the day at the apple equivalent of Disneyland isn’t for everyone — the lines, the waits, the massive amounts of people, the complaining children… been there, done that. So after a couple years of mega orchard-ing, we started to seek out smaller, less-traveled orchards. There. Are. TONS! Some of you may love the bigger venues, but for those who want something a little less grandiose this apple picking season, these lesser-known gems are for you!

Bolton Orchards

Nearly a century old, Bolton Orchards offers pick-your-own apples in one of the oldest and most scenic apple orchards in New England.

Pick the perfect apples, take a hayride through the orchard, pick your own pumpkin(s), then stop by the farmstand and grab a cider donut. Word to the wise: This spot takes cash only!

Where: 159 Main St., Bolton

Carlson Orchards

Located in adorable Harvard, the apple trees of Carlson Orchards produce 60,000 bushels of apples and over 500,000 gallons of apple cider annually. They offer over 14 varieties of apples, as well as a pumpkin patch.

Where: 115 Oak Hill Road, Harvard

Meadowbrook Orchards

Meadowbrook Orchards is located on 100 acres of rolling farmland in Sterling, where five generations of the same family have worked the land for over a century. Four kinds of apples are grown here, along with pumpkins and non-fall fruits. With a restaurant and bakery inside, Meadowbrook also bakes and serves up their own specialty food products and baked goods from the apples.

Given that there are no hayrides, mazes, or animals, this is definitely a place where you’ll want to sit on their deck after you’ve picked and enjoy the view.

Where: 209 Chace Hill Rd., Sterling

Berlin Orchards

Berlin Orchards is set atop 200 acres of rolling hills and strives to carry on the tradition of providing customers with a “wonderful family experience of picking apples in a quiet and serene atmosphere.” The orchard offers 12 varieties of apples, hay wagon rides, a pumpkin patch, and, occasionally, face painting and pony rides.

Where: 310 Sawyer Hill Rd., Berlin

Carver Hill Orchards

Want to go way off the beaten path? Try Carver Hill Orchard in Stow. Pick some apples, spread out a blanket, and appreciate an authentic orchard experience. Pack a lunch (or buy one from their concession stand) and bask in rural New England at its finest.

Where: 101 Brookside Ave., Stow

Nicewicz Family Farm

A third-generation family farm, Nicewicz offers hayrides, pick-your-own apples, and an opportunity to enjoy the beauty of the quintessential New England fall backdrop. This orchard gets rave reviews by locals.

Where: 116 Sawyer Rd., Bolton

Hyland Orchard

Hyland Orchard in Sturbridge offers more than just apples. With live music, disc golf, animals, apple picking, pumpkins, a huge open area for kids to run around, and Rapscallion beers on tap for adults to have a round, there’s a little something for everyone.

Where: 3 Lake Rd., Fiskdale

Parlee Farms

Tyngsboro’s Parlee Farms offers the standard fresh cider donuts, hayrides, animals to feed, apple and pumpkin picking, and a hay bale maze, but they also have a few rides for kids, a corn roasting station, and if you go late enough in the season, you can get an AMAZING deal on pumpkins!

Where: 95 Farwell Road, Tyngsboro

Drew Farm

Drew Farm in Westford, while small, allows patrons a little room to breathe (read: not completely overrun with huge crowds). Like most of the other orchards, this farm offers a hayride up to the orchard as well as pony rides and, usually, a s’mores area.

Where: 31 Tadmuck Rd., Westford

Westward Orchards

Take a wagon ride to the pumpkin patch, PYO apples and pumpkins, and revel in the fact that you are accomplishing a low-maintenance apple picking day at Westward Orchards. Also, word on the street is they have dynamite cider donuts.

Where: 178 Mass Ave., Harvard

Autumn Hill

In Groton, Autumn Hill is an authentic working orchard with 84 acres of scenic farmland with spectacular hilltop vistas including Wachusett, Monadnock, Pak Monadnock, and Nissitissit Hills. Take a picnic and make yourself at home at one of their picnic tables set up on the high ridge where you enjoy the view. If you come at the right time in the season, you’ll find PYO apples, pumpkins, AND concord grapes!

Where: 495 Chicopee Row, Groton

Doe’s Orchard

One of the “younger” orchards (and definitely one with no frills) Doe’s invites visitors to PYO apples, pumpkins, and gourds. If you’re looking for something sweet, pick up some of their local honey, cider, and maple syrup.

Where: 327 Ayer Rd., Harvard

Take Care of Mom :: My Staycation Alone

By

Morgan Sheena

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October 3, 2018

As a mom to three kids with big voices and huge personalities, it can be tricky to get a word in edgewise. It can also be tricky to even think when you have all the things in your head and all their voices yammering away all day long. I’ve found that as a mom, I desperately need my alone time to decompress. Time completely and totally by myself to come back to me, to feel refreshed, and to be a better mom, wife, and person.

Though I make it a priority to exercise as much as I can, sometimes I need even more alone time. I’m talking a few hours to be completely, blissfully, and undeniably alone. So about once a year I go to a local hotel and spend a night all by myself — a solo staycation. Just me, a king size bed, a TV all to myself, and room service. I recommend every mom give this a try if it’s possible for you and your family.

In theory, it sounds kind of romantic and exciting. It’s anything but.

I literally take some time all by myself to be alone with my thoughts. I need that little bit of time to relax and feel more like myself again. Every time I do this I have visions of indulging in spa treatments, swimming in the hotel pool, getting in a morning workout, and eating fancy food alone. The reality is this: I read a book while eating dinner alone, I take a long, hot shower, and I sprawl out in a bed all by myself with terrible movies on and a bottle of wine on the bedside table. I go to the bathroom alone, sleep uninterrupted, and eat a hot meal. I sleep as late as I dare (11 a.m.!) and take my time getting myself ready in the morning.

For a full 18 hours, I hole up in my room for a day and don’t do a thing. I take a little time to recharge my batteries and come back from my time away a lot calmer than I was when I left. I’m excited to get back to my family and the normalcy of life, and I go back with fewer bags under my eyes and a more relaxed attitude.

While I felt a bit selfish the first time I tried this (that mom guilt is so real), I remind myself that self-care is not negotiable. As moms, we are always putting ourselves last. It’s not selfish to take care of yourself. So whether you do get to spend some time alone in a hotel room (check Groupon for some great deals!), or even go to the bathroom by yourself, don’t forget to take care of you. When mom is happy, everything is so much better.

25 of the Best Kid-Friendly Pumpkin Spice Recipes

By

Jalisa Harris

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October 2, 2018

It’s officially pumpkin spice season. From coffee and desserts to even soup, you can put pumpkin in almost anything! I’ve rounded up 25 of the best pumpkin spice recipes that even the kids can enjoy. Happy fall!

25 pumpkin recipes pin

1. The kiddos will love these pumpkin spice dirt cupcakes.

Pumpkin Spiced Dirt Cupcakes — Photo and recipe courtesy The Shirley Journey.

2. This pie dip will be a hit at those Halloween parties.

Pumpkin Pie Dip — Photo and recipe courtesy MomsWhoSave.

3. If your kiddos like pudding, this is a great fall recipe.

4. My son loves chocolate chip pancakes, so these pancake bites are a hit in our house.

5. We started a holiday tradition where every holiday we create muddy buddies. My son loves it!

Pumpkin Muddie Buddies — Recipe and photo courtesy Thrifty Jinxy.

6. Ice cream is one of those desserts you can eat year round, so this one is a must.

Pumpkin Ice Cream — Recipe and photo courtesy Thrifty Jinxy.

7. If you have any leftover pie, this milkshake is essential when you have a sweet tooth.

pumpkin pie milkshake — Recipe and photo courtesy The Rising Spoon.

8. Snickerdoodles have always been my fave. I was so bummed when Dunkin’ Donuts didn’t bring them back. So these pumpkin flavored cookies are definitely a must.

9. So many people enjoy hummus, so this recipe is a go-to for fall events.

Pumpkin Hummus — Recipe and photo courtesy VNutrition.

10. I eat low-carb, but my son is a bread lover — especially when it comes to sweet bread. So this recipe is a must in my house.

Pumpkin bread — Recipe and photo courtesy Dancing through the Rain.

11. If cheesecake brownies are a favorite indulgence, these are a must-have!

Pumpkin Cheesecake Brownies — Recipe and photo courtesy Living Sweet Moments.

12. Waffles can be heaven to a kid. Even if you’re going for a healthier lifestyle, these are great for the fall season.

Healthy pumpkin waffles — Recipe and photo courtesy To Simply Inspire.

13. What kid doesn’t love French toast sticks?

Pumpkin french toast sticks — Recipe and photo courtesy Crayons & Cravings.

14. Calling all Instant Pot fans! This cheesecake should be your first fall recipe.

Instapot Pumpkin Cheesecake — Recipe and photo courtesy Simply Happy Foodie.

15. Make-ahead meals are so important in a busy household, so this bread in a jar is perfect.

Pumpkin yeast bread in a jar — Recipe and photo courtesy Happy Kitchen.Rocks.

16. Chocolate chip cookies are my son’s favorite cookies, so adding a little spice is something he wouldn’t expect.

Pumpkin chocolate chip cookies — Recipe and photo courtesy The Monday Box.

17. With Halloween around the corner, this trail mix is great for a snack.

Pumpkin trail mix — Recipe and photo courtesy the Country Chic Cottage.

18. Donuts are almost every kid’s request, so these are a must for the spice season.

Pumpkin Spiced Donuts — Recipe and photo courtesy All Things Mamma.

19. Curry is a family favorite — this curry recipe will make a delicious addition to your repertoire!

pumpkin spice curry — Recipe and photo courtesy the Soccer Mom Blog.

20. If you’re a traditional chocolate chip cookie lover, try adding a little spice!

Pumpkin cookies — Recipe and photo courtesy Baking Beauty.

21. The little ones will enjoy these freezer pops — especially when teething (or just as a snack)!

pumpkin pie freezer pops — Recipe and photo courtesy Trisha Dishes.

22. Cream cheese — the cheese of the season! This will be great at those Halloween and Thanksgiving Day parties.

Pumpkin spice cream cheese — Recipe and photo courtesy Foodal.

23. October and November can still be spent outdoors. Having a s’mores night would be extra festive with these marshmallows.

Pumpkin pie marshmallows — Recipe and photo courtesy Mia Cupcake.

24. When you’re a busy mom on the go, parfaits can be your best friend. At the office or at home, the spice gives this a little kick!

pumpkin spice parfait — Recipe and photo courtesy Everyday Savvy.

25. I loved bread pudding when I was younger! Introduce your kids to this festive fall favorite with a pumpkin twist.

Pumpkin bread pudding — Recipe and photo courtesy Recipes from a Pantry.

Enjoying the Toddler Years (It Can Be Hard!)

By

Shirley Anne Rodriguez

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September 27, 2018

Disclaimer: I cried ugly tears writing this piece!

Let me start by saying that I have a 2-year-old who I love with all my heart. But let me tell you something: These years are definitely rough.

I saw a post on Facebook today that brought me to tears. It’s a poem called “The Last Time” (the author is unknown). It hit home for me because my oldest is now 7, and sometimes I miss the days when he was younger and he depended on me to carry him! (He is now 70 pounds — ain’t no carrying happening!)

After reading the poem, I felt compelled to document some of the things our toddlers do that — at times — may drive us crazy or leave us exhausted, but, in the long run, are things we might never relive with our children.

They want us to carry them all. the. time.

My youngest kiddo is 35+ pounds. He has always been a big boy. He loves to be carried. I am about 130 pounds, thin-boned, and just not strong overall, and this boy kicks my behind every time I carry him — even if I use a carrier. I try to remind myself that one day I will not be able to pick him up, because he will be too heavy or because he just won’t need or want it.

They want to sleep on top of us

Both of my boys enjoy co-sleeping. I know it’s a heated debate, but that’s not what I’m here for. We let them sleep with us. My youngest loves to sleep on top of me. (Despite the fact that it causes me to lose my breath at times.) But one day they will be teenagers, they won’t want to sleep in the same room, they will want privacy, they will go to sleep on their own, they won’t want me to read books to them. Even thinking about it makes my heart sad (ugly tears…).

They need us to give them baths

I don’t remember the last time I gave my oldest a bath. He is now 7 years old — he is able to do it on his own. He doesn’t depend on me for everything (although I do have to remind him sometimes that he needs to take a bath!). I’m enjoying, while I can, making bubble baths for my 2-year-old and letting him splash water all over (even though I hate the cleaning). He will grow one day, and these little things won’t matter to him and won’t bring the amazing smiles I see in his face now.

He wants to sit on my lap while I work

I work at home, and most of the time, I’m on my laptop. My 2-year-old is with me 90% of the time. Although my toddler is able to play on his own, he loves to be close to me. He draws, he uses play dough, he watches cartoons, and he wants to do all of this while on my lap. In all honesty, it drives me nuts because I don’t have enough space to work. But yet again, how long will he be interested in sitting on my lap? Forever? No!

So, although I might be exhausted and my toddler might be completely dependent on me, this won’t be a lifelong situation. Let’s all enjoy it, live it, soak it in… because in a blink of an eye these little ones won’t be so little anymore!

Moving to Greater Boston :: Hopedale

By

Megan Chen

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September 26, 2018

Maybe you’ve been in Boston for years, but you’re now having kids and looking to relocate. Maybe you’re planning a move to the Boston area from another city in the U.S. or abroad, and you’re trying to make sense of your options. Whatever the case, Boston Moms is here to help with a handy guide to some popular towns in the area! We’ll tell you about the vibe, income levels, schools, and fun insider info to help you figure out the best place for you.

(Also, check out our guides to Acton, East Arlington, Milton, North Andover, North Attleboro, Salem, Scituate, Somerville, the South End, and South Weymouth!)

How we got here

I bought my first home in Hopedale in 2009, as I grew up in neighboring Mendon and wanted to stay local. After my husband and I got married, we decided to stay in Hopedale. We both loved the small-town community feel and knew we wanted to raise our children near family. My husband, who moved to Hopedale from Brighton, loved having a garage and a yard for the first time. We both worked close to the city and got our daily dose of city life while still being able to come home to our quiet, friendly town.

Vibe :: Small town

With a population of fewer than 6,000 and an area covering just over five square miles, Hopedale is a small town. I hadn’t lived here long before I had a network of people around town who all knew each other and introduced me to new people (hello, babysitters!). Hopedale has a fascinating history. It was home to the Draper Corporation back in the late 1800s. The Draper Mill, right in the center of town, was one of the largest producers of textile machinery in the country. Houses, as well as the library, school, gymnasium, community center, and parks, were built for Draper workers and are still used by residents today. Though Draper has been abandoned since the 1970s, the town’s history seeps through in appearance and feel.

Live :: Mostly single-family homes

Most Hopedale residents are homeowners (88%, according to Trulia). The town is comprised of mostly single-family homes, but there are also condos and historic duplexes. The average home cost is around $300,000. One of the things I love about Hopedale is that there are so many different types of properties. There are large, modern homes and historic homes built over a century ago — all within the same area.

Learn

Hopedale has a preschool, an elementary school (K–6), and a junior/senior high school (7-12). The junior/ senior high school has approximately 550 students total, including students from surrounding towns who choose to enroll through school choice (approximately 15% of students). The average scores of Hopedale students on both state and national standardized tests are above average. Hopedale schools also offer a variety of clubs and sports. Additionally, there are two vocational/technical high schools in the area.

Play

Although Hopedale is tiny, there are plenty of things to do that are simple and fun, especially for families. There is a park/playground in the center of town, a community center that offers activities for people of all ages (including a candlepin bowling alley), a library, an ice arena, and the Hopedale Parklands, which is a lovely hiking trail that circles Hopedale Pond. There is also the Little Red Shop Museum, which features artifacts of the history of Hopedale.

There are many community events we look forward to each year. In the winter, there is a holiday stroll, where local businesses set up activities and goodies around town as a prelude to the town’s tree lighting. There is a pond-side fire by Hopedale Pond where everyone can enjoy s’mores in February. In the spring, there is a big egg hunt on the lawn of the Community House, and a Fairy Walk where the Hopedale Parklands are peppered with little fairy houses created by local residents and businesses. In the summer, there are concerts each week at the park, including pre-concert music and games for the kids. There are also kayak and canoe rentals on Hopedale Pond throughout summer.

Milford, next to Hopedale, features a paved bike/walking trail, a brewery, and a mountain biking trail. A much larger town than Hopedale, Milford also offers many shopping centers and restaurants. In neighboring Mendon, there is Southwick’s Zoo and a drive-in movie theater.

Go

There is no getting around it — you need a car to live in Hopedale. Hopedale is close to 495 (just one exit from the Mass Pike), and Route 16 runs right through town. Many commuters ride the MBTA out of nearby Franklin or Ashland. The closest city is Worcester, though we can also be in Boston or Providence within an hour (depending on traffic, of course). We can also be on the Cape in about an hour.

We hope you’ve found this guide helpful!

Stay tuned for more town guides to clue you in about Greater Boston’s many terrific family-oriented places to live.

Also, see our previous guides to Act on, East Arlington, Milton, North Andover, North Attleboro, Salem, Scituate, Somerville, the South End, and South Weymouth!)

Adventures in Feeding… and Lessons in Gratitude (23)

Why I Decided to Have My Son Evaluated for ADHD

By

Caitlin Hynes

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September 25, 2018

I knew I was in trouble as soon as I felt my son’s first movements while he was growing warm and content inside me. The boy rarely stopped moving.

The only time he grew still was when I wanted his father to feel him kick. Which happened to give me a preview of how stubborn he is. That and the fact that I had to have three separate anatomy ultrasounds, including a special fetal echocardiogram, because he wouldn’t let the medical professionals see what they needed to see when they wanted to see it. (And of course his movements earlier in the day had mimicked those of a rhythmic gymnast going for the gold.)

But the true testament to my boy’s strong will and independent nature was his birth. Because of my gestational diabetes (and the estimated 10-pound size of my darling child), my OB/GYN decided to induce me at 39 weeks. I showed up to the hospital bright and early on a Tuesday, and I went home still pregnant on Thursday. After 48 hours of the wonderful doctors and nurses throwing everything they had at my uterus, and I went home empty-handed but still pregnant. Two cervical drugs, a cervical foley, HOURS of Pitocin, and a failed manual attempt to break my water did NOTHING. My son wanted no part of having anyone tell him he needed to come out. My water broke Friday at the OB/GYN’s office, thanks to an infection, so I was admitted and underwent a C-section Friday night to forcibly evict my son from his preferred dwelling.

Everyone joked about how my son was never going to do anything he didn’t want to. Everyone joked about how I was in for it. Everyone was right.

When my son turned 3, my husband and I decided to remove him from his in-home daycare and put him in a more structured preschool daycare center. He needed a bigger group of kids (his own age or older) and some more rules. Fortunately, we found a wonderful place with amazing teachers that he absolutely loves. And it’s been a wonderful experience for him. But it has also definitely opened my eyes. While I have always been very honest about my son’s (at times) challenging behaviors, hearing it from his new teachers was a shock at first.

At the first parent-teacher conference of the year, I looked at his progress report and saw most of the categories marked with “More Attention Needed.” None of this information was new, but to see it laid out on paper so boldly was hard to take. His teachers were so kind and had many positive things to say about my boy. But it was clear that in a lot of ways, he wasn’t where his peers were. I could barely ask questions as my brain worked to process it all. Yet it really wasn’t new information. And I’m a special education teacher.

I was much more prepared by the next conference in June. Fortunately, my son had made some progress, but in terms of the categories on the report, not too much seemed to have changed. His teachers reported times he had difficulty transitioning to new activities and games with peers, and outbursts of emotion over tiny things. They reminded my husband and I several times that “he’s just not a tabletop learning kind of kid.” I was sad, but I was determined to do what was best for my boy.

My husband and I always joked that an ADHD diagnosis was coming down the pike. After the conference, we decided to have a formal evaluation done for our son this fall, after he turns 4.

I’m not seeking medication or to turn my son into something or someone he isn’t. I’m not looking for him to get straight A’s as he gets older. I don’t care if he eventually gets a job where he sits at a desk all day. I just don’t want him to hate school or his teachers because things are so hard for him.

My son is spirited and enthusiastic about almost all things right now. I would hate to see that die out because people are always correcting him or redirecting him. I don’t want him to lose his energy or strong will. But there’s a time and a place. And he thinks anytime and anywhere is the time and place. And I’ll own that it stresses me out more than I care to admit. But it would stress me out more to see him be sad and defeated in school all the time. I’m not 100% sure an official ADHD diagnosis will “fix” anything, but my boy deserves what it might.

Dear Parents Hosting My Kids’ Playdates: Do You Keep Guns in the House?

By

Jessie Keppeler

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September 24, 2018

When I was 10, we received a phone call that my 11-year-old cousin had been shot and was on life support. It was the first time I remember seeing my father cry.

My cousin, Anthony, wasn’t in a gang. Or a victim of a drive-by shooting. Or even hunting for deer with his dad.

He was at a playdate.

He and his friend had found a handgun in his friend’s parents’ closet. It was unlocked. And, as it turns out, it was loaded.

A day later, Anthony died.

I think about him often. We were, after all, the same age. We both liked Michael Jackson. And basketball. And being utter goofballs. Anthony’s laugh made me laugh.

And I think about my uncle, too. How he lost his little boy when he was just a bit older than my daughter is now. How it must have felt like so much life and love had just slipped through his fingers.

In an instant.

As we all know all too well, gun safety is not an issue of the past. With shootings at schools and movie theaters so common today, guns and what to do about them are on all of our minds. And it starts at home: One out of three homes with children have guns. And 80% of unintentional firearm deaths of children under 15 occur in a home.

And while sometimes it feels too big to battle, there is one very tangible, very immediate thing I can do to help keep my kids safe.

I can email their friends’ parents and ask whether they keep guns in the house. A bit forward? Perhaps. Essential? Hopefully not. But good practice? I believe so. And also, perhaps, a way to open the dialogue about gun control.

A couple years ago, when my oldest was in kindergarten, I wrote about the drop-off playdate and how I was a little nervous about sending my children forth to others’ homes without being there to supervise. And I also admitted that while the tough questions crossed my mind, I didn’t ask them then. I was too unsure of myself.

But a couple years have passed. My chubby-cheeked kindergartner is now a leggy third-grader. And as she’s navigated playground and sleepover politics, we’ve talked a lot about not letting others’ opinions of you matter more than the one you hold of yourself.

I’m learning, too.

So this school year, in addition to sharpening their pencils and labeling their backpacks, I’m giving myself this assignment:

Be bold. Ask the tough questions. For them. For Anthony.

Here’s what I’ll say:

Dear friends,

I’m writing to you as the parent of a friend of my children to ask whether you keep any guns in your home? If so, how are they stored?

You may know that I’m an advocate for common sense gun laws, but I’m embarrassed to say that I’ve never asked anyone this question before. It feels a bit awkward! But I know that it shouldn’t, and that it’s so important.

To reciprocate, I’ll let you know that we don’t keep any guns in our home.

Here are some handy resources in case you’re thinking about how and why to ask:

http://askingsaveskids.org

http://besmartforkids.org

Thank you,

Jessie

Two Truths and a Lie — the Family Dinner Table Version

By

Teresa Kett

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September 19, 2018

Family Dinner: My Favorite Time of Day - Boston Moms Blog — Photo courtesy Leah LaRiccia Photography.

The mad rush from daycare pickup to bedtime just about does me in some days. Everyone’s “hangry,” thirsty, and tired all at once. So by the time we sit down to actually eat, it’s time to talk about something other than what someone needs.

Enter “Two Truths and a Lie” — the family dinner table version. Also known as “The Game” in my house.

It’s a game I’m sure you’ve played at some point or another, either with a group of daring friends or as a professional icebreaker. I presented it to my kids like this: During our family dinner time, tell everyone two things about your day that really happened, and one thing that’s not true — your “silly.” The rest of us get to guess which is your silly, or the thing that didn’t happen. (I try to avoid the word “lie” in the very black-and-white world my preschoolers currently live in.)

My 4-year-old caught on right away. It took a few weeks of whispering in my 3-year-old’s ear before she figured it out enough to play on her own. Now she regularly talks about climbing on the roof, putting the potty on the roof, or sleeping on the roof. Along with who she played with at school and what she ate for lunch. I’m hoping the roof fascination disappears before it becomes truth.

Little nuggets of my kids’ days will appear during the game. Something they made for that day’s school project. Which teacher was on duty that day. Who was absent because they’re on vacation. Fun things that matter in my kids’ world that I love hearing from their perspective.

I hope the tidbits about our days help my kids absorb a bit of the world their parents live in that’s outside of our home. Things about our jobs, who we ate lunch with, and how we have frustrating moments too.

In addition to the built-in bonding at our family dinner hour, our game helps teach logic. My oldest is starting to puzzle out the clues his dad and I sprinkle into our three things. That if I say I got stuck in lots of traffic, and he was among the last to be picked up, it’s probably true. He’s also getting pretty good at coming up with a realistic silly thing, and he has outsmarted us all a few times.

Let’s just hope “The Game” isn’t also teaching them how to get good at lying!

Fall for Soup :: 6 Tried-and-True Recipes Your Family Will Love

By

Emily Fahle

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September 18, 2018

One of my favorite things about the weather turning cooler is making a huge pot of soup on the weekend and enjoying it all week long. Soup is a big hit with everyone in my house, and it’s a great way for me to sneak extra veggies into my family’s diet. Grab a loaf of crunchy French bread, or try making these delicious (and low-fat, high-protein!) garlic knots, and get your soup pot on! These are all tried-and-true recipes in our house — please share yours, too!

Steak and Vegetable Soup

3 pounds steak — use best quality cut possible

2 bay leaves
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon oregano, crushed
1/2 teaspoon dried marjoram, crushed
1/4 teaspoon pepper
1 10-ounce package frozen corn
1 16-ounce can diced tomatoes
1 1/2 cups cubed, peeled potatoes
1 cup fresh or frozen green beans
1 cup sliced carrots
1 cup sliced celery
1/2 cup chopped onion

8 cups beef broth

In a large Dutch oven or kettle, combine meat, bay leaves, salt, oregano, marjoram, pepper, and beef broth. Bring to boiling and then reduce heat.

Cover and simmer for 2 hours on low.

Skim any fat and return broth to pot. Stir in meat, corn, tomatoes, potatoes, beans, carrots, celery, and onion. Return to boiling and reduce heat again.

Cover and simmer about 30 minutes or until vegetables are crisp-tender. Discard bay leaves and serve.

Beer Cheese Soup

1 cup diced carrots
1/4 cup diced onion
1/2 cup diced celery
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 teaspoon hot pepper sauce (adjust for personal taste)
1/8 teaspoon cayenne pepper (adjust for personal taste)
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
3 cups chicken broth
2 cups dark beer
1/3 cup butter
1/3 cup flour
4 cups milk or half and half
8 cups sharp Cheddar cheese, shredded
1 tablespoon Dijon mustard
2 teaspoons Worcestershire sauce
1 teaspoon dry mustard
popped popcorn, for garnish

In a large saucepan over medium heat, stir together carrots, onion, celery, and garlic. Stir in hot pepper sauce, cayenne pepper, salt, and pepper. Pour in chicken broth; simmer until vegetables are tender, about 12 minutes. For a stronger beer flavor, add beer just before vegetables are done. Remove from heat.

Meanwhile, heat butter in a large soup pot over medium-high heat. Stir in flour with a wire whisk; cook, stirring until the flour is light brown, about 3 or 4 minutes. Gradually stir in milk, whisking to prevent scorching, until thickened. Remove from heat, and gradually stir in cheese. Keep warm.

Stir beer mixture into cheese mixture. Stir in Dijon mustard, Worcestershire sauce, and dry mustard. Adjust for hot pepper sauce. Bring to a simmer, and cook 10 minutes. Serve topped with popcorn.

* Recipe adapted from here.

Lasagna Soup

Cooking spray
14 ounces chicken or pork sausage, casings removed
1/2 onion, chopped
3 cloves garlic, crushed
4 tablespoons fresh parsley (dried is also OK), divided
3 cups low sodium chicken broth
2 1/2 cups water
2 cups marinara sauce
2 bay leaves
cracked pepper and salt
6–8 lasagna noodles, broken into bite size pieces

For topping
6 tablespoons mozzarella cheese
1/2 cup ricotta cheese
2 tablespoons chopped parsley
2 tablespoons chopped basil

Heat a large soup pot or Dutch oven over medium heat, spray with oil and add the sausage; cook until browned, breaking it up as it cooks with a wooden spoon, 4 to 5 minutes.

Add the chopped onion and crushed garlic and cook 2 to 3 minutes.

Add the parsley, broth, water, marinara sauce, bay leaves, and fresh black pepper and bring to a boil; cover, reduce heat, and simmer about 30 minutes.

In a medium bowl combine the ricotta, parmesan, and 2 tablespoons parsley; mix.

Add the broken pasta; cook, uncovered, according to package directions.

Spoon into bowls and top each with 2 tablespoons ricotta cheese mixture, mozzarella, fresh cracked pepper and salt and fresh basil on top.

Broccoli Cheese Soup

6 tablespoons butter, diced in cubes
1 cup finely chopped yellow onion
1 large clove garlic, finely minced
1/4 cup + 3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
3 1/4 cups milk (anything but skim), then more to thin if desired
1 14.5-ounce can chicken broth
1/2 cup heavy cream
3 cups finely chopped fresh broccoli florets
2 cups freshly shredded sharp cheddar cheese, plus more for serving
1/3 cup freshly, finely shredded Parmesan cheese
salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste

Melt butter in medium saucepan over medium high heat. Add in onions and cook, stirring frequently until soft, about 3 minutes.

Add in garlic and flour, and cook for about 1 minute, stirring constantly. While whisking, slowly pour in milk, chicken broth, and broccoli. Cook, stirring constantly, until mixture begins to gently boil and thicken, then reduce heat to a simmer and allow to cook, stirring very frequently, until broccoli is tender, 5–7 minutes.

Stir in cream. Remove from heat, stir in cheddar and parmesan cheeses, mixing until melted. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Serve warm with more cheddar if desired.

Chicken Tortilla Soup

1 pound chicken breasts or thighs
1 can drained and rinsed black beans
1 can drained and rinsed sweet corn
1 jar salsa
3 cups low sodium chicken broth

For topping
1/4 cup shredded cheddar cheese
3 slices avocado
1/4 lime
tortilla strips or crushed chips
dollop sour cream

Spray a slow cooker with cooking spray and place chicken in the bottom of it. Pour salsa, beans, and corn over the top of chicken.

Cook on low for 6 hours or high for 4 hours.

After chicken is cooked through, shred chicken with two forks and mix thoroughly. Add chicken broth and cook for an additional 1–2 hours.

Spoon to serve and top with cheese, avocado, chips. Squeeze lime over and dollop with sour cream.

Roasted Butternut Squash and Apple Soup

1 medium butternut squash, cut length wise
1 medium red onion
2 medium apples — McIntosh work well
3 cups vegetable or low sodium chicken broth
1/4 roasted pumpkin seeds
1/2 teaspoon dried sage

Coat inside of the squash halves with olive oil, salt, and pepper

Place squash meat side down on a cookie sheet and roast for 20–25 minutes at 375 degrees.

Meanwhile, cut and cube onion and apple. In a mixing bowl, toss lightly with olive oil, salt, and pepper. Pour on a cookie sheet and add to oven to roast.

When squash is fork soft, take it out of the oven. Let cool and then peel skin. Place in large soup pot.

When onion and apple are fork soft, add to soup pot. Add broth.

With an immersion blender, blend ingredients until preferred texture. Let soup simmer on medium high for flavors to meld for about 30 minutes.

Serve and top with pumpkin seeds and sage.

Adventures in Feeding… and Lessons in Gratitude (5)