How We Love Our Books and Libraries

June 27, 2015

Reading has been one of my favorite hobbies for as long as I can remember. Sadly, since having a child of my own I have not been able to finish a single book. However, thanks to the internet available on every mobile device, I do read the trending articles whenever I get a chance.

I have a 19-month-old son, Zain, born in November 2013. I started to read books to him as part of his bedtime routine when he was 2 months old and transitioning from the bassinet in our room to the crib in the nursery. Every night before I put him down to sleep, we read a book. Initially, we stuck to a couple of classics so he would start to recognize them. The first two books we introduced were “Peek-a-Boo Jungle” by Francesca Ferri and the ever popular “The Very Hungry Caterpillar” by Eric Carle. Very quickly, these two became his favorites. Little did I know that very soon he would be obsessed with reading books.

Living in New England, you want to spend the summer outdoors as much as you can. It wasn’t until September last year, when he was almost 10 months old and walking, that I started taking him to the library for story and play time. It was like a whole new world opened up for him. He loved seeing all the new books, some of which went home with us for a few weeks. I started to build a small book collection for him at home, too, so he had some of his favorite books at all times. He was always very excited to go to the library, and thus it became a ritual for us a couple times a week.

We live in Peabody, which is part of the North Shore area. Of the three libraries in Peabody, we usually go to the Peabody Institute Library on Main Street. We love the main library because it is huge and has the lovely Sutton Room where all the special music concerts take place. Their children’s section is also pretty big. The only thing lacking there is a weekly toddler story time that is geared for kids under the age of 2. The best toddler-friendly program in the towns around us is at the Peabody Institute Library of Danvers. We loved going there all through the winter. They have an hour-long program a couple times a week — story time is followed by music and dance, with a take-home craft to round it out. I have friends in Melrose and Wakefield and have attended story times at both those towns’ libraries. Those are really great for younger kids and were very enjoyable for my son.

Now that summer is here, we still stop by the library on our way to other activities to grab some books. Zain has learned so many words from all these books. He keeps himself busy with them while this mommy cooks and cleans. Now that he is older, he definitely has preferences on what books he wants to get, and we have to oblige his request to read the books over and over, all day long. I feel so happy that my son shares my love of reading. I hope this develops into a lifelong interest.

Get Pumped!

Lindsay Goldberg

June 26, 2015

Note: This week is National Breastfeeding Week. We celebrate, support, and honor all ways moms choose to feed and nourish their children.

I remember the day I opened my breast pump. I was a couple of weeks into the New Mommy Thing. My mom and my good friend were by my side. I took the pump out, took a look at the pieces, took a look at the manual, and cried. We’re talking huge tears, snotty nose, ugly cried.

I knew I wanted to exclusively breastfeed my child and then continue to breastfeed after introducing solids. I knew I was going back to work when she was three months. I knew the only way to avoid formula was to make this pump my friend. So I did. My pump became my best friend — OK, maybe that’s a bit of a stretch. I did, however, manage to make it to the one-year mark of pumping! Some days were harder than others, and there definitely were tricks I learned along the way.

1. Pump early and pump often.

Start pumping before you go back to work. I started around the three- or four-week mark, which helped me build a freezer supply and get super familiar with my pump. I pumped twice a day, on top of feedings, and very rarely used any of that supply before I went back to work. By the time I headed back to the office, I had a million or so ounces of liquid gold.

2. Work your baby’s feedings around your work schedule.

I breastfed my baby right before I took her to daycare and then raced back to daycare to nurse her for the late afternoon feed, rather than use a bottle. Most days this worked. Some days, I either didn’t get there in time or chose to do something else right after work.

3. Treat your pumping times as standing meetings.

When you go back to work, or even before, talk to your supervisor about your plans. Let him/her know the pumping schedule you are hoping for, and get his/her support. Explain that you may need to adjust this and describe how your schedule will be adjusted. Legally, your employer has to provide you with time and space to pump until your baby turns 1. I was very lucky that my employer was supportive of this and had a spectacular space to do so. During my designated pumping times — 10 a.m. and 2 p.m. — no one was allowed to bother me. Early on, my breasts would let me know my pumping time was approaching. As time went on, I would have to rely on my Outlook reminder. Either way, this time was sacred.

4. Make a system and use all available shortcuts.

I had my pumping routine down to the minute — two minutes to set up, 20 minutes of pumping, three minutes to disassemble and clean. At first I balked at the Medela Quick Clean wipes. But they proved to be such a time and sanity saver while at work, and I did a full soak of my parts at home overnight. The Medela microwavable sterilization bags also saved my sanity on those “never enough hours in the day” worknights.

5. Think of your baby.

Visualize your baby latching on and nursing. Take a piece of your baby’s clothing. Look at pictures of her on your phone. It may sound airy-fairy, but doing so has been proven to increase milk production. Especially as your baby goes through growth spurts and demands more milk, you will want to get every ounce you can.

6. Supplement and eat well.

Hydrate!!! Make sure you are drinking enough. Breastmilk is 80% water. Enough said. Also, certain foods and supplements are known to increase milk supply. Oatmeal, garlic, and brewer’s yeast were my top three.

7. Don’t stress!

First of all, stress affects milk production in a negative way. It’s biological — if you were fighting off a sabertooth tiger, your body would not be in a breastfeeding kind of mood. When you’re stressed, your body doesn’t know there is not a sabertooth tiger around.

Also, don’t stress if pumping doesn’t work out for you. Many babies are on formula, and they are doing just fine. Maybe your baby wants more than you are able to produce. Maybe you’re sick of feeling like a milk-making machine. That’s OK. Let it go. An upset and stressed momma is much worse for your baby than a can of formula.

10 Snacks Kids Can Make on Their Own

Jenny Berk

June 25, 2015

If you’re like my family, you are constantly hearing one or more of your kids say, “Mommy, I’m hungry, can I have a snack?” Sometimes, I’m delighted to prepare something for them and will lovingly create a fruit or veggie plate. Other times, it’s like they’re asking me to give birth all over again, and the thought of making something for them is unfathomable. Especially when it’s 10 minutes before dinner and I’m obviously almost done with making it. Or 10 minutes after they have had said dinner. Or 10 minutes after they’ve brushed their teeth and are getting ready for bed. Those times just infuriate me, and I feel like yelling that the $#@% kitchen is closed!

It occurred to me, however, that the more I can empower them to be independent, to listen to their own body cues for hunger, and at the same time help them help themselves to food (and maybe even help get something ready for someone else in the family), the more I am preparing them for the real world.

Many mothers can get into a back and forth about what their kids can have at a particular time. “What should I have mommy?” (Insert whiny voice.) “How about an apple?” “No!” “How about a banana?” “No!” “How about some carrots and hummus?” “No!”

My simple rule is that they can have anything, as long as it doesn’t come in a box and it includes some kind of fruit or vegetable.

Then, I honestly don’t care when they want the snack because I know they’re getting what they need nutritionally and I don’t have to constantly be in the kitchen making something. Who’s with me?

So, here are my favorite snacks that my kiddos can make on their own, at their own volition and without asking mom or dad for permission.

1. Dates with natural peanut butter or almond butter

Provide plastic or non-sharp knives for splitting the dates and smearing the PB in them. My kids love this.

2. Pre-cut veggies with guac or hummus

3. Yogurt, granola, and berry parfait

Even my 5-year-old can make this one on her own. She pulls out a bowl, gets a yogurt smoothie and berries from the fridge, then pours some granola on top.

4. Raw veggies

My 7-year-old feels amazing about herself when I let her cut up cucumbers and peppers on her own. She doesn’t cut in the most pristine way but, honestly, who cares? Again, make sure the knife is sharp enough to penetrate the veggies but not too sharp to create bloody mishaps.

5. Strawberries

I bought this handy tool a couple of years ago, and the kids literally fight over who will use it first. They are independent, they have fun, and they eat strawberries in the process. Buy one!

6. Rice cake with cream cheese and sliced cucumber

They love the crunchiness of this.

7. Baked chickpeas tossed in cinnamon and coconut sugar

I make these in the early part of the week and keep them in the cabinet for the kids to take as snacks whenever they want. Simply open a can of chickpeas, then drain them and dry them with a paper towel. Spread on a cookie sheet and toss on the cinnamon and coconut sugar. Spray with oil spray all over and bake for 45 minutes at 350 degrees.

8. Eggs

My 10-year-old can make a fried egg on her own. She usually makes one or two and then has baby carrots or avocado slices on the side. She feels pretty awesome being able to use the stove. Obviously, spend time teaching them kitchen safety basics. (Suggested for ages 10 and up.)

9. Cut up cantaloupe or watermelon

I delegate all the melon cutting to my hubby. But once he does this, it’s fair game for everyone. We pull out toothpicks and go to town. We keep extras in the fridge in Tupperware for anyone to take at any time.

10. Trader Joe’s Inner Peas

This one is a bit of a cheat in the healthy department — but it’s easy, accessible, tasty, and much better than Doritos!

Let me hear your ideas below in the comments section. I’m always looking for more ideas!

Jenny is a wife, mother of three delicious girls, a Health Educator and Eating Psychology Coach. She is passionate about helping people attain a beautiful relationship with food, body, and self. She enjoys writing, traveling, cooking and entertaining, and taking crazy classes like improv 101 in her free time. She can be reached at [email protected] or by visiting her website: www.jennyedencoaching.com.

When Breastfeeding Sucks. Yeah, Sometimes It Does.

Matina Fell

June 24, 2015

Note: This week is National Breastfeeding Week. We celebrate, support, and honor all ways moms choose to feed and nourish their children.

At almost nine months pregnant, I decided I would give breastfeeding a shot. Breast is best after all, right? And I mean, the pictures in magazines looked so cute and snuggly and squishy and natural. I got this.

Most of my friends raved about it. “It’s soooo easy,” they said. “It’s free, FREE, FREEEEEE,” they screamed. “No bottles to make at 3 a.m. when you’re bleary-eyed and cross-eyed and have an eight-pound nugget screaming bloody murder because they’re so damn hungry even though they just ate two hours ago so you’re not sure how they could possibly be hungry again,” they mumbled under their breath.

And then P was born. And a nurse looked at me and nodded, “Baby needs to nurse.” OK… here goes nothing. So she latched on, and I literally screamed. Fire. Literal fire. I turned back to the still-nodding nurse. “Um, are you sure she’s hungry? Cuz she looks sleepy to me. And full. Real full. I think she was snacking a lot in there.” The nurse continued nodding and walked away. So I just sat there and nursed. I had just given natural birth and this was ten times worse than the ring of fire. Know what I mean?

So days turned into weeks. The pain never subsided.

I tried Lanolin, gel pads, heating pads, cooling pads, ice packs, cabbage leaves. I called my OB and got a prescription for APNO, a fancy $50 cream they only make at compounding pharmacies. I read articles, watched YouTube videos, and enlisted the help of my husband. “It’s her latch. I know it.”

I cried, I sighed, I screamed, I called my Mom 2,340 times a day. “I’m gonna QUIT! I can’t do this!” I resented feeding times. But my mama guilt kicked in, and I trudged through… Breast is best.

A few more weeks passed, the pain still searing. I met with a lactation consultant, sweating and on the verge of tears, hoping for some help. She watched me nurse, took notes, asked questions. “Everything looks great! Latch is great! You’re doing fine!” She patted me on the back, and I actually felt okay. A few days later, I was back in her office. “Things are great! Keep on nursing, mama!” I got up and left.

I called the hospital’s nursing line. I called the pediatrician. I called my mom 600 more times. I read every article on KellyMom. I called La Leche League. I called two nurse friends. “You need to see a lactation consultant,” they all said. Um, yeah. Got it. Thanks.

One more week passed. I called another lactation consultant. This was my last-ditch effort. She immediately diagnosed P with a lip and tongue tie. “You poor thing. You must’ve been in so much pain.” I literally slumped into her arms and cried. I cursed every single health care professional I had seen before her. Why had no one else caught this?!?!

We got laser treatment to correct the tongue and lip tie. The surgeon said this was one of the worst lip ties she had seen on an infant. Great. The pain slowly subsided. Nursing became easier. Quicker. Almost natural. Almost. I went on to nurse successfully for nine months.

So, there you have it — my nursing story that started off horrible and turned out okay. I wouldn’t say great, amazing, wonderful. The road was too hard to get there.

How about you? Any experiences (good, bad, or ugly) to share?

Top 10 Things You Can Do to Support a New Breastfeeding Mother

Alexandra Etscovitz

June 22, 2015

Note: This week is National Breastfeeding Week. We celebrate, support, and honor all ways moms choose to feed and nourish their children.

1. Don’t be judgy, be kind.

We are all on our own personal journeys and doing our best, and judging what you think is right for the baby is not helpful or kind. This is rule #1 in combatting the Mommy wars, which, frankly, I am so over. But this actually goes for the mom the most. Be kind to yourself. Get the help you need, and be patient and flexible with your expectations. Use formula if that works for you (even part time). For me, it was my goal to exclusively breastfeed. I thought it was natural and so for that, I thought it would be easy. WRONG. It is so hard. Especially in the beginning, when you AND your baby have no experience whatsoever. As for outside support, just remember that all moms want you to just root for them and their choices… so if she can breastfeed, give her support, and if it’s hard for her… give her more support, remind her she is amazing, and JUDGE NOT.

2. Give space, especially in those first weeks.

Everyone is different. Most moms I know need you to look away or respect that she needs space. I am not super private, and I do not need privacy breastfeeding… anymore. In the first few days, I had no clue what to do and wanted to be left alone to figure it out, not carry on a conversation. I remember hiding in my bedroom trying to master the latch, and hearing one visitor say, “Is she done eating yet? We want to meet her!” I stopped feeding my new daughter so she could see visitors, and that was a mistake. Do you like your lunch being interrupted?

3. Don’t let her think she has to do it alone.

Obviously, a mom does have to logistically breastfeed the baby on her own. But there are many diverse ways of making it work. First, a lactation consultant is a Godsend. Breastfeeding support hotlines and groups are amazing, too. Having friends who are there for you is ideal. Don’t have a friend to talk to? I loved this book, which was perfect for AFTER I knew what I was doing. Also, I know for a fact that I could not have met my goal of breastfeeding my daughters without my husband’s commitment to support me. Thanks, babe, you are the best!

4. Ask how you can help.

New moms are hormonal messes. ASK me how I am doing, how I can be supported. I am not going to advocate for my needs and ask you to help me, mostly because I am so throughly exhausted.

5. Don’t tell me horror stories of other people’s negative breastfeeding experiences.

We do not want to hear it — it does not help.

6. Give her water.

Breastfeeding mamas get thirsty like nobody’s business! I cannot even begin to explain how thirsty I was, it’s like being parched times ten. My husband acts like a sherpa in general, and his ability to bring me water allows me to feed the baby and be happy.

7. Let us eat.

Okay so we covered the thirst. But the hunger. Oh, the hunger. I did not experience intense cravings while pregnant, but the phenomenal hunger I had (and all my b’feeding pals did too) was astronomical. So feed me. I can eat with one hand, don’t worry. Just PLEASE pass the potatoes (or asparagus, or cookies, or anything).

8. Recommend your favorite Netflix show.

One of my friends used an app that tracked how often she fed her 2-month-old daughter, and it came out to be 18 of the 24 hours a day. That is a whole lot of sitting down. So, wanna do us a favor? Watch my older kid if I have one, or do the laundry and then pass the clicker, I need to watch “Orange Is the New Black” now.

9. Buy, borrow or lend.

Most mothers use a Boppy or a BreastFriend or something that works for them. It is a great gift if the mom does not have one yet. Nipple creams and breast pads are a ridiculous gift to purchase, but they’re pretty delightful to receive!

10. Cheer me on and remind me it is going to be amazing!

You could read all the articles in the world about breastfeeding benefits, but ultimately, for me, breastfeeding is the most amazing experience I have had with my girls for no other reason than the bonding. The beginning is hard — leaking, soreness, engorgement, blebs, pumping, and oh, the list goes on and on. But I can tell you from experience that it gets so much easier, and so good.

Mamas, you are rockstars no matter what your baby is drinking… so rock on!

Happy Father’s Day, Husband!

Lindsay Goldberg

June 21, 2015

Happy Father’s Day, Husband! Yes, this is a moms’ blog… but, guess what? The guys deserve some credit, too!

I want to take this time to thank you, Husband, for all you do to make our family unit thrive and to keep me from having myself committed. Husband, as a dad to our daughter, you are aware of how she looks to both of us to shape her understanding of what it is to be human, and, more particularly, how to engage in this world as a female. Although she is only a toddler, she has already been inundated — with being told she has chunky thighs, given mainly pink-colored clothing choices in the girls’ clothing section, and being mainly complimented on her beauty (OK… she is pretty cute!). We work hard to instill in her that being female does not limit her and that her worth is beyond her appearance.

Husband, you have the added responsibility of being her primary male role model… which is kind of a big deal. J will always look to you to help her navigate her social world, and I am so grateful for the guidance you are already giving her. Here are just a few reasons I am thankful for you.

1. You understand that you do not “help” me in running our household.

You are an active partner who is equally vested. Even though J is a toddler, you are already showing her what to look for in a mate and the true value of equality and reciprocity. You teach her that women are to be loved and respected. You show her that there are no “women’s” or “men’s” chores. Whether J chooses a man or a woman to be her life partner, I pray that the importance of shared responsibility will be a given.

2. You and J have your own special time together.

Every Sunday, you have your daddy-daughter walks. You do not see this as a burden, and you look forward to them. Yes, it’s a huge win for me, because it gives me much needed “me” time. More importantly, it lets her know how valuable and special she is to you. I know of someone who had this special time with his teenage daughter, and he used it to show her how men should treat her. I hope J will learn the same. Over the years, I hope she will use this time to confide in you. I will likely mess her up, as my mother did me. (We’re super close now — love you, Mom!) Hopefully, you will be there to soften the blow, and she can use this time to blow off steam.

3. You roughhouse with her.

You chase after her. You tickle her and bounce her up and down. Even though she’s a girl, she will learn that to be strong, daring, and athletic is to be admired.

4. You drop everything when she wants to have a “tea party” with you.

You drink “tea” with your pinkie out, like a proper lady should. She is your little princess and you will encourage her that she can be a girlie-girl and that’s OK.

5. I don’t know who’s happier when you come home from work.

You, as she comes running to you when she hears the door open, or her as you pick her up for a big hug and kiss.

6. You read to her. A lot.

Even when it’s the tenth reading of “The Very Hungry Caterpillar” in five minutes. You are teaching her a lifelong appreciation of books. You encourage her to “read” in her own way, even if she wants to speed read through or go back a few pages. You are teaching her to value intelligence and to forever be curious.

7. You encourage her to work things out on her own.

You don’t rush to correct her, even when she’s gotten herself seemingly stuck beneath a chair. You teach her to have confidence in her problem solving and to have pride when she works it through.

Husband, I loved you first as my boyfriend, then as my husband, and now as J’s daddy. Just as you continue to exceed my wildest expectations as a husband, I can’t wait to see how you continue to surpass J’s amazement of her daddy.

Happy Father’s Day, Husband!

Day Tripping Through New England

Kate Cotter

June 20, 2015

Living in New England, it goes without saying that we’re so fortunate to be a stone’s throw –or nice day trip—away from so many attractions that signal classic Americana summer. Strawberry-picking and beach-going, whale watching and summer festivals that feature sandcastle building and fireworks, and museums, zoos and baseball. For a quick hop, skip and a jump away, it’s easy to escape to that nostalgic era. With most other New England states only an hour or two in the car, these trips can make for fun, spontaneous getaways that do not require too much planning ahead. Here are a few ideas for some fun day trips this summer, all within a few hours’ drive from Boston or less

The Beach & Strawberry-picking in Ipswich, MA

What goes better with strawberries than sand between your toes, spending time in the sun and a refreshing dip in the ocean? One of my favorite day trips in the summer is to drive to Ipswich, 30 miles north of Boston, to spend the day at Crane Beach—a real-life Norman Rockwell painting. We then go strawberry-picking in the orchards down the street from the beach. June marks the kick-off to strawberry season, and there is nothing like picking your own and popping a few juicy berries in your mouth along the way. Kids of all ages enjoy this activity, especially since they can eat a few berries while still in the patch—just make sure some berries make it into your basket before you’re done!

Something for everyone in the family in York, Maine

Want to venture outside of Massachusetts for some family fun? A 70 mile drive north of Boston will bring you to York, Maine, a quaint New England locale that features the beautiful York Beach, ice cream shops, arcades and miniature golf, whale watching, and a zoo. In the middle of the summer, there is a weeklong festival including sandcastle-building, concerts and fireworks, among other fun events. Restaurants spotlighting lobster specials– with blueberry pie for dessert– are plentiful as well, and a hike to the Nubble Lighthouse after dinner make this day trip experience complete.

Museums, Zoos, Water fire and another Sox baseball experience in Providence, RI

Looking for a new and exciting zoo or museum to take the kids to outside of Boston, or a baseball experience other than Fenway but not too far away? Providence, RI, 51 miles southwest of Boston, also offers the opportunity to cross state lines for more family fun. The third oldest zoo in the U.S is based in Providence, and is home to almost 1,000 animals. An art and children’s museum are also there, and the unique experience of water fire—a series of bonfires on Providence’s three rivers—add to the adventure of this day trip.

With gas prices remaining low and so many summer adventures to be had, day trips from the Boston area across state lines offer a respite from the routine, with fun for everyone!

What are some of your favorite day trips?

Journey to Parenthood | It Takes a Village

Rachel Silverman

June 19, 2015

Sarah is delighted to be the mother of two-year-old Margalit Penina. By day she is the Senior Director, Operations, Planning and Analysis at Combined Jewish Philanthropies. When not working, she enjoys gardening with her daughter, taking loads of pictures, and cooking up a storm. She’s raising her daughter in Brookline, MA.
Journey to Parenting (5)

My journey to parenthood is not significantly different than many women. I was 35 years old. I had recently been diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease and after figuring out the right medication went into remission. But, something was still missing from my life. Not something. Someone. And so I began what ended up being a multi-year journey to becoming a parent.

I worked with many doctors. Doctors who officially treated me and doctors who were my friends, held my hand and answered my questions. Along the way, I suffered a miscarriage and an ectopic pregnancy before success with IVF. I like to say that I tried to have every obstetric experience. While each experience was painful, I knew that for a woman in her late 30s, they weren’t necessarily abnormal. What was slightly abnormal was that unlike many woman who suffer through this process, I was doing it by myself. I am a single mom by choice.

By myself? No. I did not become a mom by myself. I did it with the support, help and eventually only because of my medical team. I did it with the love and caring from my family. And most practically, I did it with the very hands-on involvement of my community. At every set back, my chosen family stepped in and helped me through the pain, both physical and emotional. They took me to appointments so I wouldn’t be alone. They cried and laughed with me. And so, after each setback, with the help of everyone around me, I picked myself up, put one foot in front of the other, and tried again.

And then, as the last pregnancy progressed, my community said, we are here for you. We will help you, feed you and be with you. We will pass on our baby clothes, toys and anything else you might need. We will help you run errands and we will sit with you at home.

So yes, I chose to become a single parent. And yes, the path to parenthood wasn’t straight. And yes, at the end of the day, I’m the one home alone taking care of my child. But really? I’m not alone at all. My blood family is at the other end of FaceTime whenever we want to see them, my local chosen family are in the neighborhood, and when I need to connect more broadly, there’s always the phone, email and Facebook to help me connect with my network. All of these circles of people are in our lives daily, weekly, monthly, yearly and are helping me raise my daughter.

Journey to Parenting is brought to you by Stork Ready. Stork Ready is conveniently located 15 miles north of Boston at 325 Main Street in North Reading. Offering a wide range of classes and support groups. Childbirth Education, Breastfeeding, Infant CPR, Newborn Essentials, Mommy and Baby Groups, Lactation and Postpartum Adjustment Support Groups. All in a relaxed homelike atmosphere. Their experienced staff are certified in many fields as well as work on labor and delivery & maternity units. Visit their website to see all that they offer.

If you have a story that you’d like to tell, please email me. We’re looking for guest posts of about 300-600 words long, accompanied by a couple of pictures.

A Father’s Day Shout Out to the Modern Dad!

Rebecca Couture

June 18, 2015

We’ve all read the “my husband is an idiot man-child” posts and of course we laugh and commiserate where it’s applicable, but I have to admit, I often can’t relate.

Now don’t get me wrong, my husband is by no means perfect and we don’t always split the household duties 50/50, but we try. He tries. Most of the Dads I know do the same: they cook, clean carpool, help with baths and bedtime. Why wouldn’t they? I think it’s time to give credit where credit is due and thank these “modern” Dads for all they do.

Don’t we want to be recognized and thanked for all we do as mothers and wives? Father’s Day is coming and it’s important to recognize our men for all the wonderful things they do, instead of where they fall short. I know that I couldn’t do what I do without a great partner, even with all the imperfections, God knows I’m also full of them! In honor of Father’s Day, here is a list of all the reasons why I’m a lucky wife and mom! Here’s to you babe, Happy Father’s Day!

1) You play with our kids.

There is nothing sweeter than a man teaching a child to ride a bike, throw a ball, or make a sand castle.

2) You make delicious meals for all of us.

Let’s face it, we would likely starve without you or at the very least turn into homemade mac and cheese, pancakes or grilled cheese sandwiches.

3) You kiss and hug our boys.

You aren’t afraid to show affection with them and I love to see our boys jumping into daddy’s arms to say I love you! For my money, there’s nothing sexier than a man in a suit hugging a toddler!

4) You handle morning wake up and drop off all on your own.

It’s not always easy and oftentimes, I know you grow weary of the grind, but it’s pretty impressive that you can single-handedly manage a morning. On the days I work, you manage to get our boys up, fed, dressed and off to school.

5) You grocery shop

You are good at it and since you are the one keeping us fed, I’m very thankful that you actually like to do it! You also manage to come home with twice the groceries for less money than I can, how do you do that????

6) You are committed to being involved with the kids childcare and education.

When it came time to find new childcare, you did your research, you took a tour and spoke with the director so we could make the decision together.

7) You have a busy schedule, deadlines and responsibilities, but I can count on you.

We’re in this together and I appreciate it more than you know!

We may disagree, fall behind, make mistakes, have crazy days and need breaks, but we are partners and I want to thank you! For all the Dads out there who are trying, loving their families and putting their best foot forward, thank you! We love you!

5 Super Boston-Area Summer Splash Parks — and How to Find More

Katrina McCarty

June 17, 2015

My daughter and I have checked out quite a few Boston area local spray/splash parks over the last few summers. A roundup of our top local picks as well as a few local lists to find others are included below. Please share your local favorites in the comments. We are always looking for new fun spots!

Beaver Brook Reservation (Trapelo Road, Belmont MA): Features large spray area with concrete surface and large cool rocks with multiple jets of various spray heights. Full sun on the spray deck (one end has shaded seating) so bring your sun hats, water shoes, and sunglasses. My girl loves to come armed with buckets to fill up. There is a covered / shaded picnic area and a sand covered playground with swings, slide, etc. We don’t often hit the playground since it is very sunny and we prefer to bring our dollars and grab a popsicle from the ice cream truck frequently parked nearby. Parking on street in surrounding area does get crowded, so earlier and weekdays are best. Clean and fun. Open Daily May 24 – Sep 1 from 9:30am – 7pm.

Filippello (Domenick) Park (Arlington Street, Watertown MA): Small and full-sun spray park with a variety of sprayers. You can also check out the playing fields with nearby tot lot and sunny playground. The area also boasts picnic tables and restrooms (a bonus). Easy street parking and a lot on nearby Grove St. Sprinklers are user activated. The park is a short drive from a great soft-serve ice cream / pizza spot (Celebrity). Water is on Memorial Day to Labor Day from Dawn to Dusk.

Frog Pond Spray Park (Boston, MA): The iconic downtown gem. Large shallow spray pool with picnic area, cafe, super busy playground and the nearby carousel, not to mention the splendid public garden and Common. I wish it opened earlier in the summer. Head in to the City and make a day of it! Walkable from the Green Line MBTA stop at Park Street or Arlington. Water is on July 1st – Labor Day.

Reverend Thomas Williams Park (Cedar St, Cambridge, MA): A great little find. Small asphalt spray area that is user-operated. Part shade/part sun. Next to a shady fenced playground with seats for picnics, basketball court and large swing area. There are often community owned plastic buckets, riding toys, and other items that will entertain the under 5 set. An easy walk from Mass. Ave (parking and busses). We often combine a visit here with a trip to Verna’s Donuts. Eat the sugar and burn the sugar! Win-win. For a map see the link below to City of Cambridge Water Play locations. Water is on Memorial Day to Labor Day. Park hours are generally dawn to dusk.

Fitch Spray Park (14 Ash Street – Waltham, MA): Opened in 2012 this is a relatively new park. Good spray area with variety of features. I love the umbrella shaded seats and there is a area just for toddlers. Water is on late June through August and hours are usually 10am-7pm weekdays and 12pm – 5pm weekends.

Here are some other great online sites for finding local pools, spray decks and such. Many of the local parks also have reviews on Yelp that can provide helpful tips and tricks for families wondering whether to visit or not.

City of Cambridge Waterplay Map

Boston Central Spray Parks & Pools Site

Playground Hunt

Where do you love to play in the spray?

Dads are Amazing {From a Dad}

Boston Moms

June 16, 2015

“Top 10 Places in New England for Kids”

”The Best Art Projects for Your Little One”

“What to Serve Your Toddler for Dinner”

These are parenting blog posts we have all read, all of which have some great ideas. I have noticed something very common throughout them-they are all geared towards Mom.

Where is Dad? Is he off the hook? Is he too busy working his 9-5 to make parenting decisions or be involved?

This isn’t the 1950’s anymore. The days of Don Draper coming home with a few cocktails in him and expecting a roast on the table are over.

Let me back up a little. I am a Dad to two girls, a 3 year-old and a bouncing baby girl born this past April. I consider myself to be a pretty good dad. I love my girls, spend a lot of time with them and am a pretty integral part of the parenting process. My wife and I are a team. I will fully admit that my wife does the “heavy lifting” when it comes to being a parent. She makes sure the girls have clothes to wear, food to eat….you know, the essentials. She is amazing and I couldn’t imagine having to parent without her. But when it comes to playing, disciplining, changing, feeding, bathing, waking etc., we are a team.

This is the way it is supposed to be, right? Many of my friends are fathers as well, and they all seem to be pretty active in their kids’ lives. Why is there this perception out there that fathers are “secondary” parents? The topic of dads “babysitting” their kids has been brought up a lot recently. Do you know what the definition of “babysit” is? “To look after a child or children while the parents are away.” I am a parent. I don’t get to pick and choose when it is time to be responsible because I’m male. I can babysit your kids. I can probably even manage to babysit your dog. It’s impossible for me to babysit my kid. I am just being a parent, a responsibility I took on about 9 months before my child entered into this world.

My goal in contributing to this blog is to be a voice for all the great dads out there. Maybe I can somehow even inspire some dads to take a more active interest in parenting? I applaud dads like Ashton Kutcher (Did you ever think those words would ever be spoken?) who backed a campaign to put changing tables in Men’s Rooms in public places. I can’t count how many times I had to send my wife to change my daughter’s diaper because there wasn’t a changing table in the Men’s Room.

Every day I learn different things about being a parent. Just as my kids are growing up, I am growing as a parent. My oldest daughter was “Mommy Obsessed” for her first two years. While I spent plenty of time with her and loved her the best I could, she just preferred Mom. It was a phase, everyone told me (as I sulked in the corner) and it turns out they were right. About the time we learned we were expecting child #2, my girl turned her affection to me! It was almost as if the universe told her that Mommy’s attention would soon be divided with the pregnancy and the newborn, so it’s Daddy-time. While I felt bad that my wife wasn’t getting all the love she used to, I was on cloud nine. I was my daughter’s “buddy” (as she calls me) and we have grown so close. The amount of joy I get by teaching her my favorite songs and jokes is endless.

I encourage all the dads out there to re-experience the joys of childhood and grow with their kids.

Andrew Gelles is the proud father of two girls, one welcomed in August 2011 and the other born in April 2015. He has been married to his wife Jessica since July 2008. Andrew is a Boston-lifer. Born in Boston, raised in Newton, educated at UMass Amherst (which is as far away from Boston as he has ever lived) and now resides in Natick.

Andrew has been in the Sporting Goods business since 2000 and is a Boston sports fanatic (especially the Red Sox and Patriots). He enjoys playing golf, great food, music, movies, the beach and spending as much time as possible with his family and friends.

Tick Talk: Stay Safe

Amy Deutsch

June 15, 2015

Not just gross-looking, but often disease carriers.

I’m going to admit it: I don’t like bugs.

Sure, I put on a brave front. My kids don’t know that I shudder inside as I squish the spiders, even when they make that crunchy sound. There’s a few bugs that aren’t so bad, like grasshoppers and ladybugs. And I know that bees are essential for our food chain so I try not to flinch when they get near me. Oh, and I’ve definitely gotten up close and personal with worms to show them to my kids–a great way to inspire a sense of wonder. But bug bugs–like cockroaches and beetles and flies–those are super gross, in my humble opinion.

When I lived in New York City, one of my biggest fears was bedbugs. But now that we’ve moved to the suburbs and the kids are spending more time outside, I have a new fear: ticks.

Growing up, ticks weren’t so bad. I don’t think I ever had one, though our dog certainly did. But the diseases that ticks carry have gotten worse over the past 25 years or so. According to Melinda Wenner Moyer’s recent article on Slate, we are all in serious trouble if we don’t take the danger of ticks seriously. It’s not just Lyme disease anymore (which, though treatable, is often misdiagnosed and can have serious, lingering side effects for many people.) Other diseases include anaplasmosis and babesiosis, both of which can also be hard to diagnose. And the worst of all: powassan virus which is a viral infection that we haven’t yet figured out how to treat and can result in hospitalization and death.

So what can you do?

1. Preemptively treat your shoes and clothes

Moyer recommends a pesticide called permethrin which you spray on your shoes until they are saturated, and then let them dry. (Yes, I’m sure that many of you aren’t fans of pesticides. Personally, I would prefer a pesticide over the side effects of tick-borne diseases, but check the research and make your own decision.) You can also treat your clothes this way [here’s a short video to show you how] which will keep ticks away for 5-6 washes.

2. Check for ticks daily

Ticks love warm bodies, and they especially love cracks and crevices. Ticks can be tiny so you really need to be thorough when checking. I’m talking thorough. Armpits, elbows, backs of knees, genitals, butt crack. If it’s warm, that’s where ticks want to be.

3. If you find ticks, remove them

Last summer we spent a weekend in upstate New York with a bunch of friends, and did nightly tick checks. Thank goodness we did, because one of the 5-year-olds had a tick in each armpit. (Let me tell you that pulling small ticks out of the armpits of a screaming kindergartener was one of the most stressful experiences of my life!) But it’s so important. The best way to remove a tick is with tweezers. Disinfect with alcohol, grasp as much of the tick’s body as possible and pull out with a slightly upward motion. Do your best to get as much of the tick out as possible, but luckily the head and mouth parts do not continue to transmit disease after being removed from the body. Here’s a great how-to video from the University of Rhode Island’s Tick Encounter Center if you want a little extra help.

This is important for your health and your family’s health. A great resource to read more is at URI’s Tick Encounter Center, and UMASS-Amherst even has a center where you can mail them your tick and they’ll identify it for you. And of course the Centers for Disease Control website is the best place to check for information about tick-borne diseases.

1. Pump early and pump often.

2. Work your baby’s feedings around your work schedule.

3. Treat your pumping times as standing meetings.

4. Make a system and use all available shortcuts.

5. Think of your baby.

6. Supplement and eat well.

7. Don’t stress!

My simple rule is that they can have anything, as long as it doesn’t come in a box and it includes some kind of fruit or vegetable.

1. Dates with natural peanut butter or almond butter

2. Pre-cut veggies with guac or hummus

3. Yogurt, granola, and berry parfait

4. Raw veggies

5. Strawberries

6. Rice cake with cream cheese and sliced cucumber

7. Baked chickpeas tossed in cinnamon and coconut sugar

8. Eggs

9. Cut up cantaloupe or watermelon

10. Trader Joe’s Inner Peas

Let me hear your ideas below in the comments section. I’m always looking for more ideas!

How about you? Any experiences (good, bad, or ugly) to share?

1. Don’t be judgy, be kind.

2. Give space, especially in those first weeks.

3. Don’t let her think she has to do it alone.

4. Ask how you can help.

5. Don’t tell me horror stories of other people’s negative breastfeeding experiences.

6. Give her water.

7. Let us eat.

8. Recommend your favorite Netflix show.

9. Buy, borrow or lend.

10. Cheer me on and remind me it is going to be amazing!

Mamas, you are rockstars no matter what your baby is drinking… so rock on!

1. You understand that you do not “help” me in running our household.

2. You and J have your own special time together.

3. You roughhouse with her.

4. You drop everything when she wants to have a “tea party” with you.

5. I don’t know who’s happier when you come home from work.

6. You read to her. A lot.

7. You encourage her to work things out on her own.

Happy Father’s Day, Husband!

The Beach & Strawberry-picking in Ipswich, MA

Something for everyone in the family in York, Maine

Museums, Zoos, Water fire and another Sox baseball experience in Providence, RI

What are some of your favorite day trips?

1) You play with our kids.

2) You make delicious meals for all of us.

3) You kiss and hug our boys.

4) You handle morning wake up and drop off all on your own.

5) You grocery shop

6) You are committed to being involved with the kids childcare and education.

7) You have a busy schedule, deadlines and responsibilities, but I can count on you.

Where do you love to play in the spray?

Where is Dad? Is he off the hook? Is he too busy working his 9-5 to make parenting decisions or be involved?

I encourage all the dads out there to re-experience the joys of childhood and grow with their kids.

I’m going to admit it: I don’t like bugs.

1. Preemptively treat your shoes and clothes

2. Check for ticks daily

3. If you find ticks, remove them

Stay smart, stay safe, and check for ticks daily!

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