Dear C and B,
It’s hard to imagine you two will be anything other than the tiny curious, cuddly, little babies you are now. But if I have learned anything during my time as a mother, it’s that life moves pretty quickly — often faster than we want. I know you will soon take your first steps across our family room rug, and in the blink of an eye you’ll take your first steps out the door to kindergarten, which will quickly morph into steps out the door to high school. There will be many moments where I wish I had a pause button. A way to freeze time and cherish each and every breath inhaled and exhaled from your unique and fragile beings.
There will also be moments where I wish I could fast forward, as quickly as possible, through a bad day — a whiny moment or an inevitable mother/daughter argument. But I promise that though all the moments I wish to pause and all the moments I wish to fast forward (at 5x speed, if possible), I will always love you. With this in mind, and before we get to the turbulent times of the mother/teenage daughter relationship, there are some things I want you to know:
I was once your age
Believe it or not (probably not as long ago as you think), I was once your age. And unfortunately for you, I remember all the crazy stuff I participated in. So please believe me when I say the rules and boundaries Dad and I set are in your best interest. I know there will be moments when you hate me, but the world can be a scary place — scarier than I’d like to admit — and if I can protect you two for just a little bit longer, and help preserve you seeing at least some of the world through the innocence and wonder of a child, I will.
You are beautiful
I hope you know you will always be beautiful because of the person you are — and not because of the number on the scale. It’s hard to avoid the Photoshopped covers of magazines, the beyond-skinny teenage celebrities leaving little to the imagination, and the evaluation of women based on their looks. But please remember, you are so much more than that. Yes, it’s important to eat the right foods and take care of your appearance, but it is so much more important to be a good person and stand by your own convictions.
Be kind
Value others and make sure they know that through your words and actions. Remember that everyone is fighting their own battle and has their own struggles. People are fragile. Be gentle with them and forgiving with yourself. Take pride in who you are and have enough self confidence not to put others down. You don’t always get back what you give in this world, but that’s OK — you should be kind because you believe it’s the right thing to do and not because you expect something in return.
Find your passion
The world is full of endless opportunities, and I hope you explore every one that comes your way. Find something you are passionate about and pursue it. You will be a happier person for this. Live out your own dreams, not the dreams of others. I will try my best to support your dreams — not my own dreams for you — because ultimately, following your own path will provide you the most happiness.
Family is everything
Being a woman isn’t easy, being a teenager is difficult, and the combination of the two can be awful. Remember that I am on your team. No matter how hard you push me away during these impending years, I will love you and be here for you always and forever.
Love, Mom
