As a toddler mom, I often find myself on the receiving end of one of “those” glances at the store, on the T, or even on a walk. You know the one I mean. It’s the, “You poor thing, I don’t envy you” look, the, “Good luck with that” look, or my favorite, “Please don’t sit down next to me with that squirmy toddler” look. Toddlers can get a bad reputation. Yes, they’re stubborn. Yes, they’re squirmy. Yes, they’re temperamental. But after spending a few months as a toddler mom, I have to say I think the world could be a better place if we all embraced life a little more like our toddlers. (Not the tantrums, of course. But bear with me here.)
Once you look past the tantrums and pickiness, the way toddlers approach the world is actually really beautiful. Let’s think about it for a minute.
They get excited about the little things.
Ants, pigeons, the flashing hand on the crosswalk light. Each of these results in a shriek of delight from my toddler. While many of us are way too busy (or maybe just too distracted?) to even notice an ant cross our path, toddlers pay attention, and they find true joy in the simplest of pleasures.
They love without hesitation.
Even our shy, somewhat stranger-averse toddler amazes me with his ability to love without hesitation. If someone he already knows brings along someone new, he automatically accepts them as someone who should be there (provided they’re a safe distance from him at first). He gives high-fives to anyone who offers a hand (and maybe even to some people who don’t). And his hugs are probably the sweetest thing in my world right now.
They forgive easily.
This is a big one. Toddlers could teach us all a thing or two about forgiveness. You bump your squirming toddler’s head as you’re trying to wrestle him/her into the car seat. You inadvertently knock over the leaning tower of DVD boxes he/she has decided is a construction project. Or you eat the last of the Goldfish during naptime. Whatever the offense may be, they are quick to forgive (after about 40 seconds of crying, of course). It’s as if toddlers have a wisdom beyond their years — they realize that whatever you did to upset them can’t come close to how much they love you. So they just move on. I’m not sure when we lose that skill, but our world would be a better place if we could find it again.
They feel their emotions.
What makes toddlerhood such a roller coaster is that they FEEL their emotions. Of course, this can pose challenges for them (and for the moms who love them), but there is something beautiful about it, too. As adults, we rarely allow ourselves to stop and just bask in our feelings — whatever they may be. We learn to bottle up feelings, or allow ourselves an allotted time, and then feel like we need to move on. Now don’t get me wrong. Some emotional regulation is important (which is why it’s a skill we work on with toddlers). But perhaps a healthy balance is ideal.
They live in the moment.
When was the last time you really lived in the present moment? When your mind didn’t wander to the past, or, more likely, to the future. (What should we have for dinner tomorrow? Who needs a permission slip signed?) Toddlers constantly live in the moment. I took a lesson from my little guy this summer. I put down the phone, put away the grocery list I was working on, and ran with him in the splash pad on a 90-degree day. And it still stands out for me as a highlight of our summer together.
If you’re lucky enough to have a toddler, or even just know one, consider spending just one day living a little more like a kid. I have a feeling you’ll be pleasantly surprised.
