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This month, I decided to try waxing down there for the first time ever at Waxing the City. As I was booking beach travel for the summer and starting to shop for bikinis, I remembered all the razor burn and shower acrobatics necessary to keep that area looking good in a bathing suit. And I decided I’d had enough. Finally, the fear of the pain of waxing my nether regions was overcome by sheer laziness. I spend enough time every day coiffing other parts of me; my crotch is one area I want to just get done and forget about for a while.

So I booked an appointment. I considered getting a bikini wax (just the parts that aren’t covered by a bathing suit), but then I thought, if I’m going to write about it, go big or go home, right? Full Brazilian, baby! And I sacrificed myself for journalistic integrity. You’re welcome.

When I booked it, I was completely psyched. It was like strapping myself into the biggest roller coaster ever. “Let’s do this thing!”

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But then, a few days before, I started to get cold feet. The day of, I was all…

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Waxing the City is super convenient to North Station, so I went after work on a weekday. My coworkers might have wondered why I was sweating so much leaving the office. But when I got there, everyone was so nice and professional that I started to feel a little better.

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I didn’t quite know how this whole thing worked, but my cerologist showed me to the room, which was very clean and minimal — like a doctor’s office, but much prettier, and without any scary instruments. There was a cloth and a little wipe on the bed. I must have looked confused, because I was kindly instructed to disrobe from the waist down (good thing she told me, because I might have just gotten completely naked) and use the wipe to clean up down there, which made me feel better —if I’m going to show a stranger my genitals, I want them looking their best!

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Then, it began. We talked about how far I wanted to go, to which I responded, “How far do you normally go?” We agreed we would just start and see when I couldn’t take the pain anymore. I was briefly worried I’d end up with one patch of naked muff and then call it quits. But then I thought, “I’ve birthed two children vaginally. No amount of pain down there is going to be worse than that. I can handle it.”

She cleaned the area and sprinkled some baby powder to prevent the wax from sticking to my skin. Then, using a tongue depressor, she spread a small dollop of wax where my leg meets my torso. It was warm and felt nice. I braced myself…

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She pulled the strip off super quickly, and I was like…

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It didn’t hurt at all! I draw a hard line between pain and discomfort, and this experience didn’t even register on the pain scale. It was just a little “ow.” And then, done. True story, folks. There were some more sensitive areas, mostly closer to the top of the front part of a bikini, but it was all super manageable. The under-most parts (the parts I was most scared of getting done) barely even stung.

I looked at the results in the mirror when it was over, and the sky opened up and the angels sang. It was magical. I left Waxing the City feeling like…

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In short, Waxing the City is fabulous. The experience is so much better (read: more fun, less painful) than I expected as a first-time waxer. I’m definitely going to continue to wax through the summer, at least. Five stars!

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