8 Ways To Create A Strong Family & Nanny Relationship

By Kelsey Dickson, Boston Baby Nurse and Nanny

This post was sponsored by our partners at Boston Baby Nurse and Nanny. We wholeheartedly recommend BBNN for your postpartum and child care needs!

Working in a positive, healthy environment is important for a happy, long-term job. Boston Baby Nurse & Nanny truly cares about the family – nanny relationship and strives to help you find the perfect match. What makes a perfect match and on-going positive relationship? Read below for 8 ways to create a strong family and nanny relationship.

  1. family and nannyCommunication is Key

Carole Kramer Arsenault, the founder of Boston Baby Nurse & Nanny says, “Communication is key!” Don’t let an annoyance build up, tackle problems early on. Ask if there is a time you can talk before or after work hours. Be honest and upfront about your concern before it gets bigger than necessary. Often times it’s a small misunderstanding that requires a minute adjustment. Carole also reminds us to be mindful of when our emotions are strong and, “Know when to pause,” and plan the conversation for another day.

  1. Matching Childcare Philosophies

It is important before hiring a nanny or accepting a job to make sure you both have the same child rearing philosophies. What form of discipline is used in the household? Remember the parents always have the final say when it comes to raising their children. However, if you know form the start that your values align then it will make for a smooth road ahead. 

  1. Clear Job Expectations

Before a contract is signed, clear job expectations should be spelled out on paper. This allows both parties to have time to ask questions and clarify what is expected of them. In return, you will avoid many common communication errors. Click here to read what you should include in a nanny agreement. 

  1. Avoiding Job Creep

What is job creep you ask? It is when new job responsibilities are being expected of the employee without appropriate compensation. Sometimes this happens because the nanny has spare time and is happy to help clean up the living room or wash outdoor toys. Before you know it, what was a kind gesture is thought to be part of the agreed upon responsibilities. To avoid job creep, if you do an additional, helpful task be sure to state you had a random chunk of spare time today and wanted to help take the load of the parents.   

  1. Be Aware of the Clock

Both the employee and employer should release the other of their duties at the agreed upon time. Being late should be a rare occasion that is always preceded with a phone call. Parents need to get to work in the morning and nannies need to get home for dinner in the evening. Often times it is stated in the nanny agreement that if the parents are over 15 minutes late, the nanny will be paid for additional time.

  1. Respect The Family – Nanny Relationshipwoman holding infant in chair

It is important, especially in front of the children, to always be kind and respectful to each other. Children pick up on tone and body language. They need to see adults modeling appropriate interactions. Never undermine! If you disagree with something, ask to speak with the parent or nanny in another room afterwards. Once, “The nanny has had positive communication with the parents, she will feel more comfortable bringing up concerns, herself. You establish a relationship that way.” states Carole Kramer Arsenault.

  1. Set Boundaries

Having a nanny is a unique relationship. Sometimes a family may treat their nanny as part of the family, but it’s important to remember that all families view the relationship differently. Ahead of time boundaries should be set and the role of the nanny should be discussed. This goes both ways. Now during the pandemic, it is more common to find parents working from home. They want a comfortable environment as much as the nanny does. This is a new norm for nannies and just requires a simple conversation between the parents and nanny about what everyone is comfortable with. Perhaps that means setting the boundary that parents will join the kids for lunch or will only interfere if they are asked. 

  1. Show Your Appreciation

Nannies work really hard to care for your children; and that is their job. However, it is nice to randomly show your appreciation for all she does for your family. A little written thank you card or letting her go half an hour early on a Friday goes a long way. Life gets busy, so don’t forget to give positive feedback and comments; it builds a deeper relationship. And happiness can cause a chain reaction of compliments!

If you are looking for a nanny, Boston Baby Nurse & Nanny is here to help you find the right match. Along with these helpful 8 ways to create a strong family and nanny relationship, their boutique nanny agency serves families in Massachusetts, Connecticut, Rhode Island, and Southern New Hampshire. They focus on understanding the needs of parents and placing the best childcare professional in your home. Apply online or give us a call today at 781-444-4063! You can also visit us at bostonbabynurse.com or on Facebook or Instagram.

About The Author

Kelsey Dickson has over 15 years of experience working with children as a nanny, preschool teacher, and now a mother. She has her degree in Early Childhood Education and works for Boston Baby Nurse & Nanny as the eLearning and Blog Manager. Check out the online childcare classes, such as Baby Sign Language and Sleep Coaching 101! In her free time she enjoys gardening with her son, going for walks with her husband and dog, and discovering local wineries in New England.

Meghan was born and raised on the South Shore and attended college in Boston. After college, she married her high school sweetheart and followed him to Charleston, SC, and Groton, CT, where he served as a submarine officer in the United States Navy. Military life was an adventure, and after six crazy years of service (and two babies later!), the pair decided to move *home* to the South Shore in 2016 and put down some roots. Meghan is the proud owner of Boston Moms and work-at-home mom to William, Benjamin, and Caroline, born in 2013, 2015 and 2019. She loves meeting new people, encouraging moms, celebrating motherhood, and supporting small businesses.